What makes a man attractive?

While it might seem that the indie sleaze aesthetic was destined to be the absolute winner when laying the groundwork for choosing the year’s most desirable men, tastes are changing as fast as fleeting fashion trends do. Shortly after the craze for effete gentlemen, it was on to himbo men: rugged, handsome gents whose muscles outweigh their intellect (like Travis Kelce, Taylor Swift’s boyfriend). Definitive proof that the new masculinity that media and social media have highlighted as the most desirable is more marketing than reality is the fact that People magazine chose Patrick Dempsey as the Sexiest Man Alive in 2023. “Society tends to cling to the familiar and comfortable. These types of figures can be perceived as confident and approachable. Even though there is talk of a new masculinity, there are people who still resist the unfamiliar or something radically different. That’s why men with such elegance and a preference for classic beauty tend to win us over,” explains psychologist Lara Ferreiro.

Back to the past

Faced with a choice as surprising (the actor has been out of the spotlight since his goodbye on Grey’s Anatomy) as it is unoriginal (his Disney prince look could not be more normative), we wonder: what makes a man sexy? According to Erick Pescador Albiach, a sociologist, sexologist and specialist at Care Culture Development, it is clear that it is exactly the same as it was in the past. “Very little has changed in terms of standards and the traditional prototype of the virile male. For a large part of society (especially women), if the values that underpin power and what a sexy man is don’t change, neither does the prototype. In other words: if we don’t change how we value the masculine, what is [considered] attractive will be the same as always: an angular face with hard features representing virility and strength, half-shaven or clean-shaven (to avoid being too feminine), with a lost look and a half smile… In short, a slightly updated Humphrey Bogart, muscular and a bit more smiling,” he argues.

The sociologist points out that, in theory, a sexy man in our time should be a feminist man and, as such, empathetic. A sensitive guy, caring for himself and the people around him, loyal, respectful, positioned against abuse and violence… However, he believes that this is not sexy, as it is the opposite of the usual masculine values. “It would be necessary to reinvent the sexy man so that he is not the dominant one, just as we have been able to see a powerful and not submissive woman as sexy (or at least we are on that path),” says Pescador.

Previously, figures such as Brad Pitt, Channing Tatum and Michael B. Jordan have held this title. Thus, it is clear that normative beauty and muscles are still more sensual than vulnerability and ungainly silhouettes. And that’s despite the fact that, according to Bumble’s Dating Trends 2024 report, 32% of respondents prioritize emotional intimacy over physical intimacy for safety and understanding. According to data from an Ashley Madison study, 5% of respondents felt attracted to a person because of their intelligence; the lover is generally more educated than their spouse or partner. If that weren’t enough, according to the dating website, 31% of women are attracted to interesting life stories.

The “trendiness” factor did not influence the People’s decision to choose the actor as the Sexiest Man Alive, because, as we noted, he has seemed to live in the shadow of the “hot doctor” since he stopped appearing on Grey’s Anatomy. As editor Julie Jordan explained to USA Today in 2012, to choose the sexiest man of the year, the magazine pays attention to comments on social media and in the general media and what the general public says about celebrity coverage throughout the year. “We also ask female celebrities who they would vote for as the sexiest man in the world,” she clarified. Moreover, the magazine consults with focus groups and even asks editorial staff to give their own opinions.

Beauty is on the inside… err, on the outside, of course

Even as we strive to celebrate the new masculinity and embrace a renewed sensibility, are magazines still afraid to glamorize such figures? “They probably are, because they’re looking for what appeals to a wider audience. If a man like Patrick Dempsey generates a lot more buzz than another man, they’re going to choose to put him on the cover. The public rules! Mainstream magazines are usually driven by commercial tastes. If they know that certain standards of beauty are going to be much more profitable, they are not going to hesitate to extol these more classic images more,” Ferreiro explains.

In 2017, something happened that was even more astounding than Dempsey’s selection as the Sexiest Man Alive: the magazine chose an ugly man for that title. In reality, Blake Shelton is far from ugly, but social media went out of its way to make a canonically desirable man a joke. We suppose that comparing someone “attractive” with a Greek God like Channing Tatum makes it inevitable that, in the comparison, the poor country singer becomes a monster under the cruel gaze of social media… “It’s just that in reality, magazines are usually very cautious and very concerned about topics that can cause controversy. No one wants to receive criticism! That’s why fear sometimes leads us to make bad decisions. We know that gender stereotypes still prevail in much of the media, and that’s not new. Despite progress, entrenched stereotypes influence editorial decisions, whether we want them to or not,” explains Ferreiro.

Dan Wakeford, People’s editor-in-chief from 2019 to 2022, said that it is not just looks that are considered when assessing candidates. He cited as an example Michael B. Jordan (we know: with those biceps, talking about a spectrum outside the norm is curious to say the least), who was chosen the Sexiest Man Alive in 2020 for his activism in the Black Lives Matter movement and for the way he has always fought for women’s rights. Good old Wakeford forgot to mention the actor’s iron muscles and perfect features…

Lara Ferreiro points out that physical characteristics are the first thing that we see and what we judge first, even if later we get a good or bad impression. “Culture and media often share images of physical beauty ideals that are omnipresent on social media and in advertising and cinema. It’s normal that physique is the first thing we look at, but of course, physique isn’t everything. Sensitivity and a sense of humor are charming skills,” she says. On this point, Erick Pescador Albiach disagrees. “In our imaginary, physical standards have more weight, and these characteristics are the ones that are most represented in love and sex scenes. A man can be funny and make you laugh, but he will be a good friend, not someone to go to bed with or someone whose arms you would throw yourself into at a club. The guys who get laid and take the belle of the ball home are Superman, Thor and the vampires in Twilight,” he says. Even when magazines extol physiques that are slightly outside the norm, the media only allows a certain degree of dissent if the men being extolled are muscular, maintain a certain virility and boast of their sexual capabilities before or after.

Ferreiro reinforces the idea that pop culture and the media play a crucial role in shaping perceptions of beauty. “Actors, models, musicians and young people’s idols influence society’s image. That’s why pop culture trends can radically change the public’s preferences. Depending on the trends that emerge in each era, we tend to follow a common set of tastes. Culture is constantly changing. Although change can be slow at times, diversity in expressions of masculinity and femininity have gained recognition, and that’s a major step forward,” she says.

In reality, for as much as we think Chalamet is sexy (perhaps the fact that he’s dating Kylie Jenner makes us think that he has an ace up his sleeve that we don’t know about) and even though thousands of people signed a petition in 2021 to have Anthony Fauci voted People magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive (Brad Pitt was tapped to play the prestigious epidemiologist in a Saturday Night Live sketch), we continue to praise Disney princes with perfect teeth, chiseled features and Herculean muscles.

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