How Blake Lively became the most hated person on the internet, in five steps

In 2022, actress Anne Hathaway discovered she was the most hated person on the internet. She also learned a new term: she had been “Woman’d.” This refers to a situation where, seemingly overnight, everyone turns against a woman, and she becomes the target of widespread criticism, particularly online. A star, once celebrated for her femininity, suddenly falls from grace, caught in the endless loop of social media hate. The latest “victim” of this phenomenon is another Hollywood actress, Blake Lively, who is now facing a smear campaign executed in five steps.

Step 1: Comedy or drama?

It all began with the promotion of her latest film, It Ends With Us, an adaptation of Colleen Hoover’s popular novel. In the movie, Lively plays Lily Bloom, a florist who enters an abusive relationship with a man named Ryle Kincaid, portrayed by Justin Baldoni (who also directs the movie). Aside from a well-publicized disagreement between the two actors, the differences in their marketing strategies have raised eyebrows. Lively and Baldoni have given very different interviews, always separately.

While Baldoni used the platform to spotlight the serious issue of gender-based violence, Lively took a lighter approach, framing the film closer to a romantic comedy. She encouraged “the girls” to wear floral dresses (a recurring motif in the film) to the theater and used the moment to promote her personal ventures, including a haircare line and a drinks brand.

This perceived frivolity did not go unnoticed on social media. “This is the most insensitive thing I have ever seen in my life. This film is about domestic violence. Why are they promoting it as if it were a Barbie movie?” one user commented on X.

Asked on the red carpet what it meant to her to play a woman who was abused, Lively did not take the opportunity to raise awareness on the issue but instead assured that the protagonist is much more than a victim or a survivor: “No experience can define you, you define yourself,” she said.

Following the promotional tour, it appears that Lively received advice to address the issue of abuse more seriously. Shortly after the film’s premiere, she posted several Instagram Stories providing useful information and resources for victims of gender-based violence.

Step 2: “Have you seen my hair?”

In a thought-provoking piece, New York Times reporter Esther Zuckerman explores how the imagery in It Ends With Us draws from Lively’s off-screen business ventures, presenting the film as a captivating study in the dynamics of star power. “Blake Lively’s hair is like a character unto itself in the new romantic drama,” she notes. The actress’s luscious locks shift in style, mirroring the ups and downs of Lily Bloom, a florist entangled in a tumultuous relationship with an abusive neurosurgeon.

Zuckerman continues: “You could say Blake Lively’s hair is a tool she uses to sell her performance, but her performance is also a tool she uses to sell her hair. Those who are impressed with her locks in It Ends With Us can learn from her Instagram that she recently debuted a line of hair-care products called Blake Brown.”

Moreover, during the promotional campaign, an email was sent to the media outlining steps to create cocktails inspired by It Ends With Us using Betty Buzz, Lively’s own beverage brand. However, this cheerful recipe starkly contrasts with the film’s serious subject matter, which revolves around a woman enduring abuse.

Step 3: Miscellaneous blunders

At the beginning of the summer, Lively made a notable misstep. In the wake of the uproar surrounding Kate Middleton’s poorly photoshopped images — where the British royal family attempted to project a sense of normalcy — the actress chimed in on the mockery by sharing a poorly retouched photo of herself while promoting her beverage brand. Shortly thereafter, the Princess of Wales publicly revealed her cancer diagnosis. Lively quickly took to Instagram to express her remorse, stating that she was “mortified” by her actions.

The social media backlash against Lively has spiraled dramatically, spawning parodies and memes criticizing her demeanor during promotional interviews for It Ends With Us. Critics have accused her of engaging in mean girl behavior, labeling her as a “shrew” or a “pick-me girl”— a term for women who seek male approval while disparaging other women in the process. As Janira Planes explained: “A pick-me woman in an environment of conservative men fits the type of person who openly says that ‘women are meaner than men.’”

Moreover, social media users have taken to editing videos featuring Lively’s seemingly rude behavior, showcasing moments where she has told fans to quiet down on the red carpet so she could better engage with the press. In one instance, she thanked a fan for a beaded bracelet with little enthusiasm, remarking, “I’m going to put it here because it doesn’t go with my outfit, but I will wear it later.” This candidness from Lively feels out of place in Hollywood’s carefully curated environment, where publicists often train stars to excel in public relations, both in interviews and with fans.

Step 4: That interview

In 2016, while promoting Café Society, Lively faced her first awkward moment when questioned about her relationship with Woody Allen. At the time, Allen was still mired in controversy over the rape accusations from his stepdaughter, Dylan Farrow, who claimed the incident occurred when she was a child. Lively responded by stating that she could only speak from her own experience, asserting that in her opinion, Allen empowered women. While it’s likely that no answer would have been the correct one given the context, her choice of words struck many as insensitive, if not downright tone-deaf.

That promotional tour also featured another uncomfortable moment. While pregnant with her second child with Ryan Reynolds, Lively participated in an interview with Norwegian-born, Los Angeles-based reporter Kjersti Flaa. The reporter began by congratulating the actress on her “little bump.” Lively responded with visible irritation, adopting a somewhat defiant demeanor and a passive-aggressive tone as she answered questions, often avoiding eye contact with the journalist.

The video had remained unseen until now, when Flaa decided to publish it on YouTube with the biting title The Blake Lively Interview That Made Me Want to Quit My Job. The avalanche of comments that followed prompted the reporter to create a new video explaining why she chose to share the interview eight years after their encounter.

Flaa discusses how that experience left her feeling insecure in subsequent interviews with other celebrities and offers her perspective on Lively’s handling of the situation. She notes that in instances of bullying, the recommended first step is usually to apologize. However, she suggests that in Lively’s case, the strategy employed by her team — her publicist, public relations personnel, and image consultants — seems to be quite the opposite: maintaining silence, leaking a couple of positive stories to the press to bolster her popularity, and simply moving on.

The reporter acknowledges that starting an interview by congratulating a pregnant celebrity and mentioning her belly may not be the best approach. But she is right to highlight how celebrities navigate and manage their reputational crises.

Step 5: The slavery controversy

In a remarkably short period, Lively has experienced a significant shift in public perception, prompting many critics to delve into her past for additional reasons to dislike her. One notable instance is her failed attempt to enter the lifestyle industry in 2014 with the launch of Preserve, an online store reminiscent of Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop but with a more rustic aesthetic. One of the site’s early posts was titled “The Allure of Antebellum,” a choice that drew criticism for romanticizing the pre-Civil War Southern aesthetic while overlooking its ties to the slavery era. The website lasted only a year.

There’s more. Lively’s secret wedding to Ryan Reynolds in 2012 took place at a stunning estate in South Carolina, a ceremony attended by just 35 guests. While Lively donned a beautiful Marchesa gown and Reynolds wore a tailored Burberry suit, the location sparked controversy. The wedding was held at Boone Hall Plantation, one of the oldest working plantations in the United States, which had a history of using enslaved Black individuals for decades. Boone Hall Plantation is also featured in the well-known 2004 film The Notebook, and today, the site still has preserved slave cabins with historical information.

Years later, Reynolds publicly expressed regret over their choice of venue, stating, “What we saw at the time was a wedding venue on Pinterest. What we saw after was a place built upon devastating tragedy.”

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